My parents are both 73 now and still deeply in love. Ever since I was a boy, I dreamed of having a marriage like theirs. But life, as it often does, had other plans for me.
My first marriage was to a woman who already had a four-year-old daughter. Together, we had two more children. Sadly, our union didn’t last. After the divorce, I met another woman—childless but eager to start a family with me. We had a child together, but for reasons I still don’t fully understand, our relationship also fell apart.
Now, my current partner has two children, eight and twelve. I’d hoped we could build a proper family together, but we clashed on so many things. She carried guilt toward her ex-husband, and whenever her kids stayed with us—twice a month—I felt like an outsider.
Tension grew between us. We loved each other, but I struggled with how our life together unfolded. I longed for a harmonious new family and found it hard to accept the way things were.
Luckily, we learned to talk openly about what troubled us and decided to work on our relationship. Now, I truly believe good relationships don’t just happen—you have to build them, day by day.
I’ve made peace with some dreams staying out of reach, and that’s lifted a weight off my shoulders. For instance, I know we’ll never have a romantic holiday just the two of us—she spends all her time off with her kids. So instead, I make sure I’m not alone: I see mates, spend time with my sister.
Life’s taught me that you’ve got to be tough-minded, or disappointment will eat you alive. It took courage, but I saved our relationship by letting go of what I’d imagined.
